The Ever-Loving Virgin Prince
Monday, January 05, 2004
A Sing-Songy Day
I find myself filled with joy, overflowing with life-loving cheer. Perhaps it’s leftover from Festivus. Perhaps I’m simply high on life. I know not. All I know is I feel like kicking my legs up and strutting out into the streets. I feel like singing, like rhyming “riddley rum dum-dum” with a “yum chum-chum” as penguins dance behind me. All my lecherous feelings have left me, leaving instead nonsensical glee! I’m left asking myself “What would Dick Van Dyke do?” I’ll tell you what he’d do! He’d pop his chimney-soot covered face up and sing! Let’s sing!
It’s a fine old night
to pull my mask on tight
and join Jacko in a tree
‘cuz my toga’s on
and my mother’s gone
it’s a Roman’s life for me!
There’s no rain or snow
only wine that flows
and I’ve feng-shui-ed all of my chi
now I’ll drop my pants
and do a vulgar dance
for it’s a Roman’s life for me!
Riddley rum dum-dum
and a yum chum-chum
and a yam-yam didley-oddle dee!
for I’ll drop my pants
and do a vulgar dance
it’s a Roman’s life for me
There’s a lusty man
a lascivian
and he’s rocking like the sea
for he’s dropped his pants
and done a vulgar dance
it’s a Roman’s life for he!
Riddley rum dum-dum
and a yum chum-chum
and a yam-yam didley-oddle dee!
for he’s dropped his pants
and done a vulgar dance
it’s a Roman’s life for he
In the great white north
Rush Girl sallies forth
on a sexy exposed knee
and she’ll drop her pants
and do a vulgar dance
for it’s a Roman life for she!
Riddley rum dum-dum
and a yum chum-chum
and a yam-yam didley-oddle dee!
for she’ll drop her pants
and do a vulgar dance
for it’s a Roman life for she
(Aye! That’s beautiful! All you giraffes join in and kick your legs up high!)
Not too far from here
sits Mister Mystere
he’s a prude, and far from free
he’ll not drop his pants
or do a vulgar dance
a New Englander is he!
Riddley rum dum-dum
and a yum chum-chum
and a yam-yam didley-oddle dee!
he’ll not drop his pants
or do a vulgar dance
a New Englander is he!
And my pal Green Mike
rides his magic bike
and Red Raven’s drinking tea
they’ll both drop their pants
and do a vulgar dance
it’s a Roman’s life for we!
Riddley rum dum-dum
and a yum chum-chum
and a yam-yam didley-oddle dee!
for they’ll drop their pants
and do a vulgar dance
it’s a Roman’s life for we
So let loose your hair
and have not a care
let your bits hang loose and free
may you drop your pants
and do a vulgar dance
it’s a Roman’s life for thee!
Riddley rum dum-dum
and a yum chum-chum
and a yam-yam didley-oddle dee!
may you drop your pants
and do a vulgar dance
it’s a Roman’s life for thee
Marvelous! Simply marvelous! This song, it’s stimulating! I’m inspired, truly inspired, I think I’ll drop my pants and go out dancing, kicking my legs up high and marching down the street in my boxer shorts. I’ll not stop until I’ve reached the Food Network headquarters and succeeded in my quest to have them put on a cooking show co-hosted by William Shatner and Christopher Walken. Good day!
It’s a fine old night
to pull my mask on tight
and join Jacko in a tree
‘cuz my toga’s on
and my mother’s gone
it’s a Roman’s life for me!
There’s no rain or snow
only wine that flows
and I’ve feng-shui-ed all of my chi
now I’ll drop my pants
and do a vulgar dance
for it’s a Roman’s life for me!
Riddley rum dum-dum
and a yum chum-chum
and a yam-yam didley-oddle dee!
for I’ll drop my pants
and do a vulgar dance
it’s a Roman’s life for me
There’s a lusty man
a lascivian
and he’s rocking like the sea
for he’s dropped his pants
and done a vulgar dance
it’s a Roman’s life for he!
Riddley rum dum-dum
and a yum chum-chum
and a yam-yam didley-oddle dee!
for he’s dropped his pants
and done a vulgar dance
it’s a Roman’s life for he
In the great white north
Rush Girl sallies forth
on a sexy exposed knee
and she’ll drop her pants
and do a vulgar dance
for it’s a Roman life for she!
Riddley rum dum-dum
and a yum chum-chum
and a yam-yam didley-oddle dee!
for she’ll drop her pants
and do a vulgar dance
for it’s a Roman life for she
(Aye! That’s beautiful! All you giraffes join in and kick your legs up high!)
Not too far from here
sits Mister Mystere
he’s a prude, and far from free
he’ll not drop his pants
or do a vulgar dance
a New Englander is he!
Riddley rum dum-dum
and a yum chum-chum
and a yam-yam didley-oddle dee!
he’ll not drop his pants
or do a vulgar dance
a New Englander is he!
And my pal Green Mike
rides his magic bike
and Red Raven’s drinking tea
they’ll both drop their pants
and do a vulgar dance
it’s a Roman’s life for we!
Riddley rum dum-dum
and a yum chum-chum
and a yam-yam didley-oddle dee!
for they’ll drop their pants
and do a vulgar dance
it’s a Roman’s life for we
So let loose your hair
and have not a care
let your bits hang loose and free
may you drop your pants
and do a vulgar dance
it’s a Roman’s life for thee!
Riddley rum dum-dum
and a yum chum-chum
and a yam-yam didley-oddle dee!
may you drop your pants
and do a vulgar dance
it’s a Roman’s life for thee
Marvelous! Simply marvelous! This song, it’s stimulating! I’m inspired, truly inspired, I think I’ll drop my pants and go out dancing, kicking my legs up high and marching down the street in my boxer shorts. I’ll not stop until I’ve reached the Food Network headquarters and succeeded in my quest to have them put on a cooking show co-hosted by William Shatner and Christopher Walken. Good day!
